{"id":829,"date":"2019-11-15T18:23:51","date_gmt":"2019-11-15T17:23:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/pplactus.com\/?p=829"},"modified":"2019-11-20T21:36:33","modified_gmt":"2019-11-20T20:36:33","slug":"blagues-di-fous","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/?p=829","title":{"rendered":"Blagues di fous"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">La tomate marocaine<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Une tomate marocaine rencontre un chou-fleur et lui demande un rdv.  Le chou-fleur arrive en retard, la tomate lui dit : \u00a0\u00bb oh t&rsquo;abuse CHOUFF L&rsquo;HEURE &#8230; !!!!\u00a0\u00bb  (en arabe chouff veut dire regarde).<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Le policier et l&rsquo;arabe<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<!--more-->\n\n\n\n<p>C\u2019est un Arabe qui se fait cavaler par un policier. L\u2019Arabe trouve une \u00e9glise pour s\u2019y cacher.  Il trouve le d\u00e9guisement d\u2019une s\u0153ur. Le policier entre dans l\u2019\u00e9glise et trouve trois s\u0153urs en train de prier. Il leur demande \u00e0 chacune leur pr\u00e9nom.   La premi\u00e8re dit \u00ab&nbsp;S\u0153ur Th\u00e9r\u00e8se&nbsp;\u00bb, la deuxi\u00e8me \u00ab&nbsp;S\u0153ur marie&nbsp;\u00bb, la troisi\u00e8me&nbsp;: &nbsp;\u00ab&nbsp;S\u0152UR PRISE&nbsp;\u00bb&nbsp;!  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Le jeune Arabe<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Un groupe de jeunes, parmi lesquels un pu bl\u00e9dard, discute. L\u2019un\nd\u2019eux pose la devinette suivante :<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group\"><div class=\"wp-block-group__inner-container is-layout-flow wp-block-group-is-layout-flow\">\n<p>_ Quelle est la compagnie d&rsquo;assurance qui t&rsquo;assure que tu ne mourras jamais ?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_  Un jeune r\u00e9pond la Maf<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_ Non, perdu&nbsp;!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_ Un autre, la Macif.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_ Non&nbsp;plus&nbsp;!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Le bl\u00e9dard prend alors la parole et dit : Non ci la MAT MOUT (matmut)&nbsp;! \u00ab&nbsp;Matt\nmout&nbsp;\u00bb veut dire ne meurt pas en arabe.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Le professeur arabe<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>C\u2019est un professeur Arabe qui a eu son dipl\u00f4me de\nmath\u00e9matiques.Il a eu un poste en France dans un lyc\u00e9e professionnel. Il se\npr\u00e9sente \u00e0 sa classe&nbsp;:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00ab&nbsp;Bonjour je m\u2019appille Abdellah, je suis votre proufisseur dou math\u00e9matiques, on va fire des exercices di math\u00e9matiques, di vid\u00e9o&#8230;&nbsp;\u00bb.  Ensuite un \u00e9l\u00e8ve l\u00e8ve la main et demande&nbsp;:  <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_ Monsieur Monsieur&nbsp;! On va faire des vid\u00e9os pornos&nbsp;?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>_ Le professeur r\u00e9pond, ouii bi\u00e9ne sour ou va fire di vid\u00e9o porno, pour vous, pour tou l\u2019monde&nbsp;!\u00a0\u00bb<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>Yousra et Nesrine<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Article paru dans <a href=\"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/Bal_act_num%C3%A9ro-2_avril-2011.pdf\"><em>Bal&rsquo;actu<\/em> num\u00e9ro 2<\/a>, avril 2011<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>La tomate marocaine Une tomate marocaine rencontre un chou-fleur et lui demande un rdv. Le chou-fleur arrive en retard, la tomate lui dit : \u00a0\u00bb oh t&rsquo;abuse CHOUFF L&rsquo;HEURE &#8230; !!!!\u00a0\u00bb (en arabe chouff veut dire regarde). Le policier et l&rsquo;arabe<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":830,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":"","twitterCardType":"","cardImageID":0,"cardImage":"","cardTitle":"","cardDesc":"","cardImageAlt":"","cardPlayer":"","cardPlayerWidth":0,"cardPlayerHeight":0,"cardPlayerStream":"","cardPlayerCodec":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[73],"tags":[150],"class_list":["post-829","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-culture","tag-blagues"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/829","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=829"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/829\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":880,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/829\/revisions\/880"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/830"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=829"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=829"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pplactus.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=829"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}